Ask Pulse: Japa forced me to leave wife in Nigeria but I'm scared she's cheating
Dear Pulse,
I’m in a long-distance marriage, living abroad while my wife is in Nigeria.
The reason for our separation is I’m not financially stable enough to bring us together. I was just able to get enough money to leave Nigeria.
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I’m worried and sick to my stomach, but I’m working hard to make it possible for us to be together.
In fact, I’m constantly troubled by the thought of my wife meeting other men, and it’s affecting my ability to focus. How do I manage this anxiety? Is it just insecurity, or is it something real?
Dear Mark,
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Long-distance relationships are challenging and require a lot of trust.
Being apart from your partner can make you miss them intensely, and your mind might start to imagine what they’re doing and who they’re with. Has she given you any reason to doubt her loyalty?
It’s important to stay calm. Even if you lived in the same city, the possibility of cheating would still exist.
You have to trust in your relationship and believe that if anything is wrong, the truth will eventually come out.
In the meantime, make sure to stay connected through video calls and text messages. Share pictures throughout the day to maintain closeness.
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Also, try to speed up your plans to meet. If the visa process is taking too long, consider visiting her in Nigeria.
Good luck.
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